Wherefore Art Thou, Imnotned?

Some of you proud 8 readers of this blog may have wondered why I’ve gone dark the past couple of days.  Did I come down with something?  Are the kids OK?  Did my wife kill me after finding out that I’ve put a limit on her credit card before her upcoming girls only weekend?

No, none of those things happened.

Except maybe the credit card part.

I have been knee deep in Church Crises du jour.  Well, maybe not crises.  But at least a whole lot o’ sumpn’ sumpn’.

Let’s start with the fire department, shall we?  No, the church did not burn down.  But Tuesday we had our annual fire alarm testing at our main campus building (yes, more fire alarm testing, but at a different building).  Which is kinda ironic since they haven’t done this testing in about 10 years.

Kinda makes a mockery of the whole “annual” part, eh?

So, imagine two fire inspectors, two sprinkler technicians, two alarm technicians, two fire suppression system technicians and one elevator technician (guess he couldn’t get a date) running around a 117,000 square foot building.

And, as you can imagine, there were alarms involved.

For.    7.    Hours.

Needless to say, I don’t think the Child Development Center kids rested during nap time.  And the senior adult choir had an even harder time hearing the piano.

I did learn something new.  This is how they test smoke detectors:

Yes, I know it didn’t alarm.  It waits 20 seconds to make sure it’s not just some random puff of smoke.  It did work.  Trust me.  I know the difference between a working alarm and a non-working alarm.  I got to experience first hand what a non-working alarm sounds like (or doesn’t sound like), since an entire portion for the building’s alarms didn’t work.

Can you say “vi-o-la-tion” boys and girls?  I knew you could.

Fire department not enough for ya?  How about EMTs?  They were responding to an epileptic seizure.

Not mine, although it felt like it at times.

A woman here for a class went into a seizure.  911 was called.  Lots of commotion.

Did I mention this woman only speaks Spanish?  CPQ, I may have to put your number on speed dial for just such an occasion in the future.

Luckily, I was able to grab one somebody who could translate, and we got the necessary info from this woman before they took her to the hospital.

Information like, oh I don’t know, what is your previous medical history? Are you allergic to any medication?  Oh, yeah, and whom should we call to pick up your children who are we are watching in our children’s center?

And completing the public service trifecta is the police.  Can’t say a whole lot about this one for privacy reasons.  Let’s just say I’ve heard some interesting stories in my time.  But nothing quite like the stories I heard this week.

OK then, that’s enough excitement for one post.  Hopefully, next week we’ll be back to your regularly scheduled program of witty banter, cute kid pictures, and random Elvis sightings.

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